My clients see change. Restoring love involves healing from resentment and relearning healthy communication patterns. Therapy is focused on validation, personal responsibility, tools, and motivation to change. Goals are generated at the first session, and couples are empowered as each lets go of self-defeating thoughts and behaviors. Healing is possible from infidelity and other hurtful life events even if love seems hopeless. Psychotherapy means "soul servant" and describes the process of integrating helpful insights and techniques related to your particular problems. Therapy is solution-focused, and options are generated together early in the counseling process. Progress and improved mood occur as grievances are heard and validated. Permanent change is possible with boundaries in place and freedom to be ourselves becomes reality. Extravagant love can replace fear and insecurity...
Passionate relationship can be realized in an atmosphere of mutual love and respect, and your deepest need to be known intimately is met as each partner becomes more emotionally giving. Most couples are stuck in a raging cycle of blame from not feeling heard. Therapy helps both partners increase awareness of wounds in the other and learn sacrificial love and empathy. Anger is a secondary emotion and never the main problem. A safe, confidential atmosphere is needed for each to have grievances finally healed. Freedom to be uniquely different from your spouse is experienced in an accepting, validating, and intimate new relationship. Recreating your marriage can be a reality as you invest an honest attempt to recover what was lost. We are created for relationship, and I believe in reconciliation and strong love.
Love can be restored through healthy boundaries, acceptance, forgiveness, empathy listening, anger management, mutual respect, identifying core values, male/female differences, and increasing awareness of each other's needs. Conflict resolution techniques include LuvTalk, a dialogue pattern which affirms each spouse thru validation. A laminated card is given to each couple which guides the "listen, understand, validate" pattern thru to resolution. This is practiced in sessions until clients become familiar with asserting and listening....even when angry.
Therapy helps increase awareness of our tendency toward dualistic thinking...."I'm right; you're wrong".... Clients practice more accepting ways of asserting needs and opinions while not demeaning each other. Family of origin issues are identified which create defenses blocking us from relating from our true self and false images of our spouse. Depression, addiction, infidelity, low self-esteem, anger, personality disorders, and biochemical disorders are addressed in individual sessions to strengthen a partner's ability to resolve marital conflicts.
Therapy approach integrates cognitive behavioral, family systems, solution-focused, and christian principles. A multi-modal approach may include a physician or dietician referral for depression or eating disorders. Sessions are relaxed, interactive, and confidential. Educational tools or readings may be given, and journaling may be helpful in your healing process.
You may opt out of any reading and discontinue therapy at any time. You may also request spiritual discussion included in sessions, and no values will be imposed at any time. Couples need individual sessions alternating with joint sessions to make adjustments in the direction or change in goals. Sessions usually last three to ten sessions depending on the problems and goals.
Marriage Counseling, relationships, dating, Christian Counseling, Couples Counseling, pre-marital counseling.